Bringing Back RODNEY DANGERFIELD COMEDY Classic One-Liners

Some classics from

Rodney to bring smile to

your face:-)

Why we miss Rodney


Because he said ....

My wife only has sex with me for a purpose.  Last
night she used me to
time an egg.

It's tough to stay married.  My wife kisses the dog
 on the lips, yet she
won't drink from my glass!

Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was
 wearing a sexy
negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home.

Greatest Bits

A girl phoned me and said, ‘Come on over. There’s nobody home.’ I went over. Nobody was home!

A hooker once told me she had a headache.

I went to a massage parlor. It was self-service.

If it weren’t for pickpockets, I’d have no sex life  all.


I was making love to this girl and she started crying.
 I said,
'Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?'
She said, 'No, I hate
myself now.'

I knew a girl so ugly that she was known as a
two-bagger. That's when you
put a bag over your head in case the bag over
 her head comes off.
I knew a girl so ugly... they use her in prisons to
cure sex offenders.

My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss
 in the kitchen the
roaches hang themselves.

I'm so ugly I stuck my head out the window and got
arrested for mooning.

Caddyshack Poster 24x36 Chevy Chase Rodney 
Dangerfield Ted (Edward) Knight

The other day I came home and a guy was jogging, naked.

I asked him, ‘Why?’ He said, ‘Because you came home early.’

My wife’s such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer.

I know I’m not sexy.

When I put my underwear on I can hear the Fruit-of-the-Loom

guys giggling.

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray “after” the meal.

My wife likes to talk on the phone during sex. She called me from

Chicago last night.

MY FAVORITE: My family was so poor that if I hadn’t been born a boy,

I wouldn’t have had anything to play with.


Bringing Back RODNEY DANGERFIELD COMEDY   Classic One-Liners

American Bandstand – 50th Anniversary Collector’s Set only 5.95 for 2 CDs


Bandstand –

Best of the



only 5.95 for 2 CDs

Spotlight dances were always among the best and most powerful moments of American Bandstand. Now you can relive 34 of the greatest with this special 2 CD set. Featuring The Jackson 5, Patsy Cline, The Temptations, Lionel Ritchie and others. Order today! American Bandstand: Best of the Spotlight Dances
The Jackson 5: Never Can Say Goodbye * The Temptations: Just My Imagination (Running Away with Me) * Dion & the Belmonts: Where or When * The Delfonics: La La Means I Love You * Patsy Cline: Crazy. 34 songs in all!


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The Teen Years and Neil Sedaka – American

Bandstand -Best of the Spotlight Dances

American Bandstand – 50th Anniversary Collector’s Set

‘Dick’ and Dee Dee Shine in Rare Oldies Concert Appearance as does JohnnyTillotson

Dick and Dee Dee circa 2011

MODESTO, CA 6-11-11

I’ve seen just about everybody who’s anybody still performing on the ‘oldies circuit,’ if you will. However, I had not seen Dick and Dee Dee.  When I read that they wouldl be  performing in the area  I became real curious, especially since Dick passed away  in 2003.



Sat night June 11 was was American Grafitti Day in Modesto, CA, home of the George Lucas 1973 movie classic depicting an early time, 1962. (Hard to believe it’s another40 years since then, as noted by John Milner-  the hot rodder in the yellow car, from the moie- madefor an interesting MC of this show. ‘I was in my 20s then and now I’m in my 60s.It was like being with family, people we grew up with andwith which we could relate.

The show was relective of what we’re seeing in oldies shows today. As there are feweroriginal acts, we had two tribute groups and two originals. A Supremes group opened the show, trying their best to copy the originals . ‘I’m Diana,’ purred  thelead, resplendent in curls much like Ross’ look in later years. The act was say the least for this listener.



Tillotson today with admirer

After what seemed like too long a segment, Milner finally came out and announced the nextact, Johnny Tillotson. I’ve seen Tillotson several times and he performs welland is good with the crowd. He only had one big rock and roll hit in the day, ‘Poetryin Motion,’ but what a hit. The audience chimed in from the opening preface ‘ When ISee My Baby. What Do I See?…Poetry in Motion’ and then takes off with its infectiousbeat and sound. The song is a early 609s pop rock classic the audience ate up.The earlier songs were all pretty good too but didnt have the same audience appeal. Tillotson was one of many artists who had a number of ‘cross-over’ counntry-pophits in the 60s, including ‘Send Me The Pillow.’ recorded by Dean Martin and othersand ‘It Keeps Right On a Hurtin,’ recorded by 112 other artsits including Elvis, according to Johnny. Tillotson could have been big on the country circuit if hewasn’t. (Will have to check out the old country charts; bet these scored high.


After intermission, Dick and Dee Dee ran out on stage, breaking into ‘Thou ShaltNot Steal. There was waif-like Dee Dee and a gray-haired Dick,   looking a l ittle too young too be originals, but they sounded just like the record. ‘Dick’ even had the falsetto part down to a tee. Maybe this WAS the ghost of Dick St. John, who passed in a roofing accident in 2003 when he fell off a ladder. Dee Dee let us believe it was the real Mccoy until she told about   Roy Orbison stopping by their dressing room  in 1961 on tour,  and how  Orbison gave  St. John his Beatle boots after Orbison had been admiring them (and before the Beatles wore them).Then, in tribute to ‘one of my favorites,’  the duo did a cover of the great orbison ballad, ‘Crying,’ which was wel suited too their voices, ala the Orbison- kd lang version from 1987.




Dick and Dee Dee in the day, circa mid-60s

Later research showed the current ‘Dick’ to be Mark Dunn, an actor/artist and NOT current ‘partner’ of Dee Dee. (OUR ERROR, having previously said that they were life partners. Our apologies to Dee Dee, her real husband and Dick . They live in Pacific Palasades near Los Angeleswith three children. Dee Dee has recently  written her memoir, Vinyl Highway,about a shy 18-year-old being thrown into the spotlight after her first songwent to #2 in 1961, meeting Orbison and the big names, trouble touring and such.Looks like an interesting read , available at their website, it looks as though there’s very little touring, so it was good to finally catch this one, spirited act.

Unfortunately, the sound at the newish Gallo Center for the Arts was not what it should be for a state-of-the -art facility, but I’ve heard worse, too.All in all the two original acts, Tillotson and Dick and Dee Dee were worth the price of admission and, because of the few acts on the bill, we got to see them perform some songs they don’t normally do such as ‘Crying.’ The final act, another tribute group, which  covered  the Temptations, was weak, only slightly better the the faux Supremes who opened the show, althoughthe audience, much less picky than this reviewer, seemed to like them (someprobably didn’t realize therre were no originals in the group.
The backing band was the same for all performers with lead guitar, bass, drumsand keyboard. They are the same ones who’ve backed most of the oldies shows at Gallo in recent years and do a very adequate job, in my opinion.
It was good to get out and hear some oldies, the first such show I’ve seen this year. Now, with summer here, there should be a few more coming through townand we’ll certainly keep you up to date – and would also love to hear your reviews of such shows in your area.


Vinyl Highway: Singing as Dick and Dee Dee

It was  a fun ‘throw-back evening, as it usually is in Modesto, concert or not.  Modesto is where Lucas grew up and  the sleepy town int he middle of nowhere was AND IS STILL very much lilke it was in the fifties, WITH  still-active drive-ins, old movie houses, cruisin’ McHenry Ave and lots of friendly people…even a tiki bar or two thrown in…Minnies

More Oldies Concerts and tiki bars